Jim

Maaan did I ever get after it today. Mark convinced me to go play bowling with him tonight. I know bowling is nothing but trouble cause they bring these huge, delicious tubes of beer out for you to drink whilst you play. Kinda like classy mini-kegs. They call em towers. I call em toobs.

So I figured I better head to the Jim to do a little pre emptive damage control. I said before, I still look like shit but I am in pretty damn good shape. I impressed the hell out of myself today.

First I lifted weights. Then I lowered them (I hate lifting and lowering weights cause those fuckers are heavy). Then I went downstairs and got on the machine and ran for a solid hour. I thought there was no way I was gonna finish when I started but it never got hard so I stayed on till the machine shut down.

Then I got on the Hand Crankulator machine which is similar to a stationary bike but it's for your arms. Then I got on the stationary bike which is like a Hand Crankulator except it's for your laigs. Then I got in the pool and swam a full mile. I wasn't planning on swimming so long but after a few lapse this huge fat pig got in the lane next to me. I wouldn't have cared except he was amazingly fast. You would never guess this dude could move from looking at him. I named him the Jellyfish because he was flappy and squishy (like jelly) and really good at swimming (like a jellyfish).



I never go into the pool with the intention of racing but if there is someone in the other lane I can't help but try to beat em. It was all I could do to stay ahead of this dude. Not only that but the son of a bitch never got tired and quit either. I figured someone so fat would only be good for a few lapse but he stayed for 25. When he finally left I was so far along I decided just to hang out and finish the full mile since I was over halfway there already.

I figure I burned over 2,000 calories today so I ain't gonna fret too much if a couple of beers happen to slip in tonight.