Elevator Music

I moved from my super classy neighborhood to one that is, shall we say, decidedly less classy. I was in the supermarket around the corner buying beans earlier for my horrible "No Life Joy" plan I've got going now. The elevator music they choose at this particular establishment is a local Hip Hop station that plays loud repetitive beats and chanting. For the most part I can't really make out what they are saying but today it was pretty easy when this one song that was on got to, I guess you would call it the chorus. It went exactly like this. I memorized it easily:

WHERE THE ASS AT?
WHERE THE ASS AT?
WHERE THE ASS AT?
WHERE THE ASS AT?

NOW WHERE THE PUSSY AT?
WHERE THE PUSSY AT?
WHERE THE PUSSY
WHERE THE PUSSY
WHERE THE PUSSY AT?

Now I'm not exactly what you would call a prude but I thought this might not be exactly the thing to be playing in a grocery store at 7 in the evening. The only way I could see that they got it past the censurers is that the FCC was stupid enough to believe they were actually talking about animals.

I made myself laugh hard imagining that it was just a hip hop version of Head and Shoulders Knees and Toes where they are teaching preschoolers about they bodiezzzzzz.