Fun games

Hey.

Any of yall jerks know any fun free games to play on the computee? Post em prix.

Superbowl replay

Is there anywhere online that has the whole Superbowl replay? I can find highlights but I wanna see the whole damn thing again.

Mondegreens

Mondegreens are awesome and are the source of endless amusement to me. The origin of one of the bandnames I was in when Martin thought Mark said Sir Cadillac.

Usually mondegreens occur when you can't figure out song lyrics. A few of my favorites:

Lilero used to think that Rock the Casba was saying "block it with asphalt"

I thought Dirty Deeds Done and They're Done Dirt Cheap was "thirty theives and the thunder chief"

When I was about 5 or 6 my sister told me that Big Girls Don't Cry was actually saying "niggers don't cry". If you listen to this song maaaan does it sound like it.


I can't remember all of but hit me up with some cause I love every one.

More Union

I also hate how the union thugs act in general. Every email I get they are addressing each other as "brother" and "sister".

"Thank you Brother Joshua for the great point about local 802. Sister Alison will be happy to educate you on anything you are unsure of".

Dadburn creepy.

Union Mentality

Some dude I know is in some musician's union. He is trying to do something or other all the time and is a big pain in the ass. So the other day I get this email from him.

Please do not debate whether a musician playing in a club is an employee or an independent contractor with anyone. Please don't seek recognition for yourself through an organizing drive. Keep quiet. Be discreet. Don't become a loose cannon. Don't develop a case of diarrhea of the mouth. Hushhhhhhhhhhhh!

Thank you.

What the fuck? Some fuck head wants to tell me what I I can or can't talk about? I sent him this reply.

I'll talk about whatever I want, whenever I want.

You're welcome

Famouse dude

I met the most obscurely famous dude ever tonight. In fact, he is so obscure I am not sure I even met him or if he was lying about who he was. Will be sure in about 2 months. Anyway, he saw the show tonight and talked my ear off.

In case you missed the show

Here is the video.

Thesis

Yall like reading thesis papers about the economics of hippity hop?

Here you go.

Big Show TOmorrow

3 Dollar beer and country music at 29th and 2nd ave 7pm. Paddy Reilly's. See yall there.

Law Talking

Last Thursday the real cops called me to come in and do a line up like in the movies to ID the knife dude who had robbed me. I hung out for about 2 hours until finally being escorted into this little dungeon room to peep through a little one way mirror at the perps. They had six sketchy characters for my perusal and I spotted my little creep right off the bat. I kinda felt bad for the little ferret looking dude all trapped like that like some kinda animal but not bad enough to not finger him.

If I'd have messed it up they woulda let him go, but I nailed it so it was grand jury testifying for me Monday. I went down town to the DA's office, got lost for about an hour in the huge confusing labyrinth they used for a building and then finally sat with the assistant DA to get my story straight. Then off we go to the grand jury room where I had to swear in (which oddly enough involved very few swear words) and tell what ha' happen. It took the grand jury about 5 minutes to indict so now it is either the perp pleads guilty or goes to trial. He will probably plead guilty cuz there was a girl that he had mugged without his max on also there who testified against him.

I got ten dollars as a witness fee from the court house so when you take into account the five bux i lost in the mugging I have made 100% profit. I am now trying to figure out a way to expand on this excellent business model and retire in a few years.

Best Day Ever

I saw a dude get horsed today. One of the carriage horses at central park totally head butted this dude and knocked him on his ass. Oooooooh the youtube hit I would have on my hands if I had been filming.

Repost

Still can't believe Cannibal Corpse made THIS video.

Drew Brees vs. Olympic archers

Excellent video of Breesus being sort of accurate.

More Magic

David Blaine

SLieght of Hand

I wish I could do this but don't wanna practice or bother.

Sometimes I Even Amaze Myself

Yesterday after running, i was legging it home through the park when I heard birds squawking overhead. I thought to myself "that sounds like a blue jay distress call". Sure enough I looked up and saw about 4 blue jays flapping around. I didn't see any predators though and thought I must have misheard the call but then I spotted the hawk hidden amongst the upper branches of their tree eyeballing them.

You don't have to say how awesome I am. I already know.

Obama Wins Peace Prize

Hurray!!! About time he got some recognition for all the....uh...wait a minute. What exactly did he do?

Dream Interpreter

Last night I dreamed I was in Gandhi's entourage at a rally in Mexico. The cops came in wearing sombreros and chained us all together and arrested us. What the hell could that mean?

Schroedinger's Cat

I always thought the dead/alive cat thing was silly. Even the genius dude who thought up the example didn't really think the cat was two things:

Schrödinger was as aware of this as anybody. He talks about his hypothetical cat and says, more or less, “Okay, if you believe what my equation says, you must believe that this cat is dead and alive at the same time.” He says, “That’s obviously nonsense, because it’s not like that. Therefore, my equation can’t be right for a cat. So there must be some other factor involved.”

800 Dead in Afgahnistan in 8 Years

That doesn't really seem too bad to me for a war. Especially since I am currently watching a sweet documentary series on WWI. That war was brutal.