Aphorisms

I am making a list of some of my favorite aphorisms. These only count is someone I know made them up though. Anyone can just go read a book of famous people's.


People are stupid.
(Chappie)

If someone goes out of their way to tell you a principle they live by, the opposite is true.
(Chappie)

Crazy people are CRAZY
(Lilero)

"Will Work For Food" means "Will Beg For Drug Money"
(Me)

If someone offers you a breath freshener, Take It.
(Me)

If the train is packed except for one car that only has one guy in it, do NOT get in that car.
(Me)

Never listen to a woman's advice on how to pick up women because she has never actually done it.
(Me)

Always Smail the milk before you take a swaller.
(Martin)

Never argue politics. The only thing you will ever convince anybody of is that they hate you.
(Me)

Whenever you find a really good parking spot, be prepared for a ticket.
(Keese)
I will add more when I think em.

Adoption

What is up with adoption? How come some people have kids they don't want and get stuck paying child support for 18 years while others get to just shovel theirs off with no obligation? What's the catch?

Humans actually are Badass

I have always been kinda disappointed at how shitty humans are compared to other animals. Other animals are complete badasses. They are lighting fast, strong as shit, agile and lithe and pretty much physically kick that all hell out of humans at everything physical. I always figured it was due soley to craftiness that allowed humans to be the dominators we are but I recently read some biology shit that points out that humans are actually really much better at some physical things I hadn't thought of before.

1. Walking. That's right walking. Get up and take a few strides. Easy as hell right? You damn right it's easy and as it turns out humans are better at walking than any other creature. Due to our wonderful sense of balance and leg bone structure we use the least amount of energy to walk of any animal. Even animals closely related to us like the chimpanzee use 4 times the amount of energy walking around. Other animals get there quicker, but we get there easiest.

2. Running. Distance running that is. In a sprint we get crushed by everything but our easy walking gait turns into a sustainable run that we can keep up for hours on end. You may not believe it but if you are in good shape you can outrun a gazelle. I actually saw a nature show where these tribal savages ran after a gazelle for 3 hours. At first the gazelle just sprinted away from them but eventually it got so hot and exhausted it said "fuck this" and collapsed on the ground. The humans who use less energy per mile and can sweat buckets (another thing we are really good at) didn't over heat and collapse and just walked up and bonked it on the melon with a brick.

3. Getting Fat. There are a few animals really good at this and we are one of them. Bears and pigs and whales kick ass at it too but we are up there. You may hate it when trying to pick up chicks or trying to avoid being mocked by your friends but your fat gut is huge advantage to have if you are an animal. And you are so congratulations! This one is pretty obvious. When you run out of food you just use your embarrassing fat to power yourself along to catch more gazelles. Other monkeys and primates kinda suck at being fat.

4. Throwing shit. Humans are the best throwers of shit. I know I have been to the zoo and saw the gorrilla throw the shit out of some shit. He could really chuck it far because he is so damn strong but it turns out not only can humans throw farther, we can hit what we are aiming at. There aren't really even that many animals in contention on this one cause very few even have hands but we beat em all. And being able to throw shit makes you a huge badass compared to other animals. A wolf might be able to tear you to bits with his scary teeth but not if he gets blasted in the face with a rock first. Also picking up a stick and wapping something with it is a big plus too and is kinda like throwing but without all the letting go part.

So anyway. There you go. Go walk around and throw things at other things and feel good about your fat ass. You're the best!

Birthday Presten

Someone Please get me THIS

Fun games

Hey.

Any of yall jerks know any fun free games to play on the computee? Post em prix.

Superbowl replay

Is there anywhere online that has the whole Superbowl replay? I can find highlights but I wanna see the whole damn thing again.

Mondegreens

Mondegreens are awesome and are the source of endless amusement to me. The origin of one of the bandnames I was in when Martin thought Mark said Sir Cadillac.

Usually mondegreens occur when you can't figure out song lyrics. A few of my favorites:

Lilero used to think that Rock the Casba was saying "block it with asphalt"

I thought Dirty Deeds Done and They're Done Dirt Cheap was "thirty theives and the thunder chief"

When I was about 5 or 6 my sister told me that Big Girls Don't Cry was actually saying "niggers don't cry". If you listen to this song maaaan does it sound like it.


I can't remember all of but hit me up with some cause I love every one.

More Union

I also hate how the union thugs act in general. Every email I get they are addressing each other as "brother" and "sister".

"Thank you Brother Joshua for the great point about local 802. Sister Alison will be happy to educate you on anything you are unsure of".

Dadburn creepy.

Union Mentality

Some dude I know is in some musician's union. He is trying to do something or other all the time and is a big pain in the ass. So the other day I get this email from him.

Please do not debate whether a musician playing in a club is an employee or an independent contractor with anyone. Please don't seek recognition for yourself through an organizing drive. Keep quiet. Be discreet. Don't become a loose cannon. Don't develop a case of diarrhea of the mouth. Hushhhhhhhhhhhh!

Thank you.

What the fuck? Some fuck head wants to tell me what I I can or can't talk about? I sent him this reply.

I'll talk about whatever I want, whenever I want.

You're welcome

Famouse dude

I met the most obscurely famous dude ever tonight. In fact, he is so obscure I am not sure I even met him or if he was lying about who he was. Will be sure in about 2 months. Anyway, he saw the show tonight and talked my ear off.

In case you missed the show

Here is the video.

Thesis

Yall like reading thesis papers about the economics of hippity hop?

Here you go.

Big Show TOmorrow

3 Dollar beer and country music at 29th and 2nd ave 7pm. Paddy Reilly's. See yall there.

Law Talking

Last Thursday the real cops called me to come in and do a line up like in the movies to ID the knife dude who had robbed me. I hung out for about 2 hours until finally being escorted into this little dungeon room to peep through a little one way mirror at the perps. They had six sketchy characters for my perusal and I spotted my little creep right off the bat. I kinda felt bad for the little ferret looking dude all trapped like that like some kinda animal but not bad enough to not finger him.

If I'd have messed it up they woulda let him go, but I nailed it so it was grand jury testifying for me Monday. I went down town to the DA's office, got lost for about an hour in the huge confusing labyrinth they used for a building and then finally sat with the assistant DA to get my story straight. Then off we go to the grand jury room where I had to swear in (which oddly enough involved very few swear words) and tell what ha' happen. It took the grand jury about 5 minutes to indict so now it is either the perp pleads guilty or goes to trial. He will probably plead guilty cuz there was a girl that he had mugged without his max on also there who testified against him.

I got ten dollars as a witness fee from the court house so when you take into account the five bux i lost in the mugging I have made 100% profit. I am now trying to figure out a way to expand on this excellent business model and retire in a few years.

Best Day Ever

I saw a dude get horsed today. One of the carriage horses at central park totally head butted this dude and knocked him on his ass. Oooooooh the youtube hit I would have on my hands if I had been filming.

Repost

Still can't believe Cannibal Corpse made THIS video.

Drew Brees vs. Olympic archers

Excellent video of Breesus being sort of accurate.

More Magic

David Blaine

SLieght of Hand

I wish I could do this but don't wanna practice or bother.

Sometimes I Even Amaze Myself

Yesterday after running, i was legging it home through the park when I heard birds squawking overhead. I thought to myself "that sounds like a blue jay distress call". Sure enough I looked up and saw about 4 blue jays flapping around. I didn't see any predators though and thought I must have misheard the call but then I spotted the hawk hidden amongst the upper branches of their tree eyeballing them.

You don't have to say how awesome I am. I already know.

Obama Wins Peace Prize

Hurray!!! About time he got some recognition for all the....uh...wait a minute. What exactly did he do?

Dream Interpreter

Last night I dreamed I was in Gandhi's entourage at a rally in Mexico. The cops came in wearing sombreros and chained us all together and arrested us. What the hell could that mean?

Schroedinger's Cat

I always thought the dead/alive cat thing was silly. Even the genius dude who thought up the example didn't really think the cat was two things:

Schrödinger was as aware of this as anybody. He talks about his hypothetical cat and says, more or less, “Okay, if you believe what my equation says, you must believe that this cat is dead and alive at the same time.” He says, “That’s obviously nonsense, because it’s not like that. Therefore, my equation can’t be right for a cat. So there must be some other factor involved.”

800 Dead in Afgahnistan in 8 Years

That doesn't really seem too bad to me for a war. Especially since I am currently watching a sweet documentary series on WWI. That war was brutal.

Just how badly do you want those Dodgers tickets?

Email forward from today.

Where is nilk skinny pic?

You got before and after pix? I think I am about 4-5 lbs lighter since two weaks ago. Don't have a scale but can really tell pants getting floppy. I need to do at least another 5 by race day.

Where is nilk skinny pic?

Wanna Chonga

Sunday we are making Chimi Chongas at the Saints game at Marx. I can't wait but I gotta pay for it in advance with no eating all week. Them chongas gonna be so good.

Running Sux

I should be able to finish the 5k but damn if I will do it with any kind of speed. I ran today and nearly died. Hopefully it was just cuz I didn't eat a damn thang all day and was starving.

Children at Church

Worshiping.

Taxi

Do NYC cabbies have to take you anywhere in the city? If you grab a cab at Yankee Stadium does he have to take you to JFK if you request it? Staten Island to Harlem? Or can they just say sorry dude, you gotta walk and bus it like Martin.

Bad Guys Busted

Well, we caught the bad guys on camera and they will be arrested. I did a little sleuthing around and was able to figure out that there were 2 people involved with the mugging. I even found out their names and where they live. Yesterday I went to the police station to view some security video they uncovered that they thought might show the bad guys.

The video shows me walking by followed by the exact two bad guys who I figured were involved stalking me. A couple of minutes later shows the knifeman running away. I knew for sure the knife guy was involved but was delighted to see that not only was I right about the other guy but now had evidance to back me up. And the cops agree with me and will be picking them up. I may get to do some sweet testifying if I am lucky. I really hope I get to gloat and rub they stupid faces in the fact that I win in the end. I also want my 5 bux back.

Girls Rock the Boyz

Thursday night I was walking home from the country gig. I should play more gigs btw cuz I fucking kill em. Anyway, at about 110th st as I get close to Columbia this drunk college couple is hanging out in front of a bar. By drunk I mean hammered and they are having a kinda of argument. I overhear the dude (who was humongous) saying that he likes to flirt with all the girls in all the bars but it doesn't mean anything cause he never fools around with them.

So as I am walking past, the chick (who was fantastically hot) says "well how about this then" and she turns to me and raises her shirt, under which there is no brassier, and shows me a perfectly shaped boobie. Not the set, just a single.

So now the dude is mad. But he's not mad at her. Nooooo. He's mad at me. Like I did anything. So he yells at me "oh yeah, I bet you like that huh? You like that?" Of course I loved it. Who wouldn't? But that doesn't mean he should be mad at me. He should be mad at her slutty ass. He is only falling for her tricks cause this is exactly the reaction she wanted from him.

I didn't have time to say all that though and he was so drunk I doubt I could have gotten him to understand my dead-on point so instead I just stammer "I'm just walking by man".

"Yeah?" he says "well KEEP walking."

Then I hear the girl holler at me "yeah, keep walking!"

Ridiculous. She was the one showing boobie to start the whole trouble. Not me. When I was a block away they were already making out hard core.

Some Things Just Don't Seem Like They Should Mix

I got an email invitation to a rock climbing/whiskey tasting event.

The Race is On

So Mark and Martin and me are doing a 5k jog next month. O horrible jogging. I have been running every day and it is getting easier but I really gotta lose some delicious weight if I gonna go fast. Trouble is this is the beginning of football season and I really enjoy a beer and a football game.

And by "a beer" I mean several beers. And by "a football game" I mean nachos.

Righteous

For Beverley

Just kidding, this one's for her

God willing, I'll be seeing these holy hitz live on Friday. Amen.

Fashion Comes Back Around

Why oh why can't this hairstyle come back?


I mean, whoever looked at this hairstyle and thought "well, i guess it's now completely fucking stupid looking. Let's give it a shot"?

Personalized Links

For Me Only

For Mark Only

For Jock Only

For Nilk Only

For Martin Only

Muggenator

So, did you really get robbed at knife point?

Of Course.

Where?

In the ribs.


I am kinda pissed that I chickened out and didn't fight the mugger but it was certainly the smart choice cause losing a knife fight is tons worse than losing a regular one. I am kinda proud though that I didn't really freak out and think I handled myself rather admirably during the whole ordeal all things considered.

It wasn't nearly as scary as you would think to have a masked knife man telling you he is gonna fuck you up. I think it was because this particular knife man was so scared and nervous himself that he didn't really menace me properly. Plus, he was about my size and I kinda thought I could beat him up if it came to it.

I guess to have a true test of how brave I am I would need to get mugged by a huge muscle dude who was a pro and not nervous and scared at all come at me and see how I react.

But I ain't going out of my way to volunteer for that.

Goddamn Bums

I told you those bums were getting more aggressive. I just got robbed at knife point. Well, not JUST. A few hours ago. I been chillin at the police department. 10 points to the first person who can guess what he looked like.

American Dummy

I always felt kinda dumb about myself cause I don't know shit about American history and the presidents. Werl no more. Last night I memorized all 44 presidents in order. It weren't hard. All I had to do was write a boring little song about them and now they are all upstairs for good. If only someone would write a song with every english word followed by the spanish translation.

Also, Remember this?

Militant Obama Kids.

Also, Remember this?

Militant Obama Kids.

I Pledge

Have you seen this puke inducing I Pledge video? One of the pledges is "I pledge to be a servant to the president and to all mankind". A servant to the president? Fuck him. He's my servant. How is this kinda shit even remotely thought to be cool?

Also they want you to not flush the toilet after you take a piss to save water. So you have a fester pool of sewer water in your living quarters. Piss on that.

Rich's Rule of Internet Usability

The internet is great source of information provided the thing you are interested is not likely to generate a profit for anyone.


EG

I could google Austia-Hungary and immediately get tons of useful facts about this empire of yore. No one thinks they can make any money off these facts so no one gives a fuck.

Google lasik eye surgery. Say I wanna know who invented it and what the fuck it is about. Well tons of fucks think they can make money selling me this service so no info is easisly available about it. Only fuckface clinics that want to sell me shit. I love capitalism but man do I sometimes hate capitalists.

Rich's Rule of Internet Usability

Only For Mark

Chonk

States I need to go to

I would like to visit all fifty states eventually. I am not really even close but here is what's missing:

Alaska
Connecticutcut
Hawaii
Idaho
Indiana
Iowa
Kansas
Maine
Minnesota
Montana
North Dakota
Ohio
Organ
South Dakota
Utah
Wisconsin
Wyoming

33/50

Parkside Show

Played a solo show last night. Bout 15 people came to see, all strangers. Killed em. Best songs of mine crowd reaction wise were:

BoomshakalakalakaBoomshakalaklakaBoomshakalakalakalakalake Blues

Hard Drinkin Woman

Sweet Country Pussy.

Hard Sports

What thing in sports looks the easiest but is really hard? I nominate boxing. It looks so simple. Just punch that dude head. But if you ever try to hit a head that is dodging and weaving it is impossible. Plus it is exhaustinating. Go try to throw punches in the air for 3 minutes. You wont last the round.

McDonalds black?

What is up with this?

End of US?

The US debt is getting close to 12 TRILLION. The PROJECTED deficit for the next 10 years was just raised to 9 trillion. So unless something changes the national debt will be 21 trillion at that time. The USA GDP is only 14.3 trillion. Pretty soon we are gonna have more debt than we can pay off in a year if all we did was pay off debt. The interest alone on 21 Trillion will be close to a trillion bucks per year.

Currently the US debt per citizen is $38,000. Private debt per citizen (credit cards, mortgages etc.) is $24,000. So the US needs $62,000 per citizen to be debt free. Per capita income (average income) in the US is $40,000. Good luck paying off the $62,000 per.

What gets really scary is when you look at the unfunded liabilities of Medicare, Social Security and the new Federal Presciption Drug buy plan we now have. The government will need to drain $192,000 per person to fund those programs at the current benefit rate.

So a grand total of $254,000 per person is needed presently and they want to add another 9 Trillion in debt to our bill. A quarter of a million dollars per person or we are fucked.

We're Fucked.

WWI

Does anyone else love World War One? Most people think WWII is where it's at but I for me the sequel can't live up to the real thing. Anyone know any good WWI movies?

Bad Ad Placement

Stupid computer geniuses.

Movie Star

I was an extra in another movie today. That brings my NY movie total up to two. SeeSaw (I'm in the trailer but there is no way you will see me) and now Joe Average.

Labor Pains

Why when baby announcements are made do people tell you that it was done with c section? I mean I don't mind knowing but isnt that kinda private info? People dont always go around telling about all their other medical info.

Prison

Why do they let prisoners rape and kill each other in prison? If it is as common as people act like it is it seems like cruel and unusual punishment. I can see making folk cool they heels in a cell but you wouldn't put someone in a cell with a crazy chimp who is gonna fuck em up. Why can you put them with a crazy human that will?

It Begins

Hell Yeah

Rich's Links of the Day

Wierd Song

New Poll

Global Warming Real Or Fake?

Sweet Optical Illusions

I want a house made out of these.

Jock Missed Out

Maybe it was better he missed this cause my knee didn't get bent in half but Wednesday was sweet mud football in central park with the Mexicans.

Y'all Seen Micheal Jackson's Hair Catch Fire Yet?

What are you saving it for?

Speaking of ABBA

THIS VIDEO combines the two funniest sub sets of human ever. Japanese aaaaand Seventies.

ABBA Elf

This dude from ABBA really looks like an elf to me. If I ever met an elf Andy didn't look like this I would tell him keep trying.

Tambourine

I am retarded at the tambourine. I don't have the best rhythm in the world but I am pretty damn good. If I really concentrate I can keep a steady beat. However, put a tambourine in my hand and I am constantly late. Something about the tambourine is fucked up and it somehow makes the sounds later than you think it is gonna make them and you sound like a fool. I woulda thought something was wrong with me but Mark was shitty at it too at first.

Sexiest Man

This story about Elvis grbec is pretty damn funny.

New Poll

Is Hillary Clinton a stupid cunt for having that special made sling? Can't she just have a normal sling like everybody or does she have to show off with everything? Or is it classy? maybe it's classy to get special made medical devices that tell your rank.

What you thank?

Switcheroo Number too/

Me and mark and martin went to mexico on vacation.

Martin came back to the hotel room with a kilo of cocaine.

"Dude" he says "this horrible mexican gave me a thousand bucks if we sneak this cocaine across the border".

"that seems dangerous" I say "how the hell are we gonna do that"?

"I don't know" he says "maybe put it in the tires of our car as we drive across".

"Or maybe we can put it in our shampoo bottles so the dogs won't smell it" He says.


Mark comes busting in from the other room all excited.

"I have an idea! We can each take an over loaded condom up our assholes" he says.

"I don't know" says I "what if it busts and all the cocaine gets in our systems'?

Mark looks confused "What cocaine"?

Joke Template

The Switcharoo.

This joke is when you think someone is talking about something but they are really talking about something else, preferably embarrassing. It's kinda hard to describe and is better just to give an example. So.....:


I was playing guitar at this little dive down town. I had played there before so they knew me. About halfway through the set I asked if anyone had any requests. From the back some dude started hollering "SWEET COUNTRY PUSSY. I WANT SWWWWEEEEET COUNTRY PUSSSSAY!!!!"

I was like "aw yeah? you like that song huh?"

He looked at me and said "What song?"

comediens

I saw a list of top 100 comedians and it is clearly stupid cause they had assholes like Lenny Bruce and George Carlin at the top. Those guys fucking suck. Louis CK is at the top pricks.

Pointless Question

My friend Troy axed me this one. Would you give up a leg to be able to travel mars and venus in person?

I said hell no. He said he would do it. I told him he was a fucking idiot.

Bette Davis Eyes

I never knew Mark choreographed a video until I got to the face slap part of this one.

Global Wazzu?

So how psyched are you that the house of reps passed "the largest tax in American history" yesterday? I am super psyched because they did it so that we will stop the climate from changing. You know, the thing that has been constantly changing since the beginning of the earth? That thing. It will now stop changing because we have figured out what the perfect climate is and we know how to control it. Politicians will now be reffered to as Jesuses.

Micheal Jaxon

So he died and all. What a truly weird dude. He may have been the craziest person ever still capable of speech. He was also pretty evil I guess. I mean if you list terrible things to do, raping children has to be very high on the list. Probably raping them to death is number one.

He could sing like the dickens though. What is your favorite song of his? Mine is Smooth Criminal.

Men At Work

At work ripping off children's songs.

Show this Friday

Find a bad song in our set list. You can't.

Two Shots Of Whiskey

Daddy Don't Live Here No More

Paternity Test

Prettiest Girl In The Bar

Dive Bar

Whiskey

Small Town Woman

You Caught My Eye
Hard Drinking Woman
Baby Come Home and Eat Biscuits With Me

Covers will be:

If You've Got the Money Honey, I've Got the Time (Willie Nelson)
The Race

(George Jones)
East Bound and Down (Jerry Reed)
Holiday Road (Lyndsay Buckingham)
Angel Flying Too Close To The Ground (Willie Nelson)
Mama Tried (Merle Haggard)
Hey Good Looking (Hank Sr)
Baby's Got Her Blue Jeans On (Mel McDaniel)

Rich's Links of the Day

Retarded Policeman

Remember That Time?

..............

Sometimes Good Musicians do Kareoke Too

Just listen to Lyndsay Buckingham pretend to sing.

Greatest Instrument

Probably piano. Maybe guitar. Piano cause it can pretty much play any part and if you have a competent pianist you can put on a show with out any other instruments. Guitar too but less so.
Guitar is great cause name your top 100 favorite songs and guitar is probably in all of them.

Greatest instrument you don't really hear is bass. If all of a sudden the bass gets dropped out of a song you are hearing it really sounds much worse. Funny thing is bass sounds pretty terrible by itself. If you listen to just a bass line you will be bored as hell but add it to a song and rock the fuck out. Same thing for drums but they are much more obvious in casual listening. My favorite thing about recording fattest girl was when the dude would drain the drums and bass out so we could hear the vocals and then when he brought them back it it was like dropping the hammer.

Pedal Steel

Man was that guy ever awesome. I was kinda embarrassed to play along he was so good. The band is now approximately 300% better.

Pedal Steel

I get to practice with the pedal steel guy today. Very excited. The band is gonna sound sweet as hell pretty soon. Also, my meet up group has so far gotten 29 people to express interest in coming to the gig next week. Maybe good band, good crowd is the way to go.

Good Deed Averted

I found a phone in the cab Saturday Night. The owner called and I tole him to text his address to it and I would get it to him. No problem right? Well, his phone ran out of juice and I have no idea where he lives and my charger doesn't match his phone.

Cluster Fuck.

Do You Have Gay Hands?

I saw a study recently that researched a bunch of gay and straight dudes and found that if you are straight your ring finger is noticably longer than your index finger. If you are gay they are about the same. Of course I had to immediately check my hands out to see which clubs I would be hitting this weekend......

good 3/8 of an inch straight.

Suprise?

I can't believe government doesnt know what the hell it is doing!

late night

I can hear a hard core fist fight going on outside. Lots of yelling and fighting sounds and girls screaming.

Glass breaking.

Now cop siren.


In other news here is one of my favorite tv theme songs.

Toys L Us

Here is a sweet example of a chinaman switching the L's and R's.

New Band Memer

Got a new dude in the band. It is the sweet pedal steel player in this video. It is not the horrible cheesy singer dude.

Poison Ivy

We has three and a half trees knocked down by Hurricane Gustav, and we got an additional three trees removed afterward. The tree guys take all the wood and grind the stumps as part of the deal. But what they do not do is dispose of the stump shavings, leaving it up to me.

So I bought a pitchfork and tossed that shit into the back of my truck. It took me nine loads to dispose of it all. If you're wondering why I didn't use it for mulch, it's because it's too acidic right after it's been cut. So where I dumped it apparently had poison ivy, or as the doctor calls it, dermatological disorder, and I got it really bad.

I haven't had poison ivy since 2000, when I missed a week of work. I had some bumps here and there, but I just figured my immunity was building, which allegedly happens. But this time I got it on my eyes, which swelled to the point where I could hardly see. I remembered rubbing my eyes, which means the the poison ivy was probably not in my yard, but rather where I dumped the shit at the undisclosed location. I suffered badly for three days before I got a steroid shot, after which I not only dominated in volleyball, but didn't sleep for two days. But the rash went away. Thanks for performance enhancing drugs. Would a baseball player get suspended if he got a poison ivy shot?

In Other News

I started a country music meet up group in New York City. Martin thinks I am a horrible idiot and person but 11 people have said they will come to my next gig on the 26th of June. We'll see who is right.

Rich's Links of the Day

Nothing has been happening.

Hawk

I saw a big ass hawk the other day in central park. it chilled for a while then swooped down and ate a squirrel. How can squirrels take to live with the possibility of that hanging over they heads?

Old Joke

When Martin and I started working at Don's Seafood and Steakhouse they were very adamant about keeping up the image and professionalism of the establishment and wait staff. Before they would allow any waiter on the floor they made you watch this video tape. Not only that you had to sign and date a document saying that you had watched the tape and fully understood what it was about and everything it had said and agreed to act in accordance with it.

The video tape?

Tron.

Rich's Links of the Day

Galifinakus is wierd.

Dreams

Anyone have any cool dreams lately? I love kick ass dreams. Sooooo weird sometimes and yet you are tricked that they are real. I had a horrible nightmare this week that Mark got his left leg pulled off by the engine of a pleasure boat. I had to squeeze his floppy arteries to keep him from bleeding to death. Why the hell would I do that do myself? What makes me wanna think up that and scare myself with it?

Swine Flu

To me there's only one question: How can we get rich off this shit?

Rich's Links of the Day

Mind Yo Biznass

James Brown

Sometimes James Brown didn't feel like writing a fucking song. But there was a show to do so fuck it.

OOOOOOhhhhhhh Shit

They invented the term lol for this video.